#38: Girl, Interrupted

Kaysen, Susanna: Girl, Interrupted. New York: Turtle Bay Books, 1993. Print. 168 pages.
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SETTING: McClean Hospital (psychiatric hospital in Belmont, MA) between April 1967 and September 1968.

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SUMMARY: Susanna Kaysen provides readers with a memoir of her time at McClean Hospital, compiling a series of stories describing her experience.

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FAVORITE QUOTE: "Every window on Alcatraz has a view of San Francisco." - page 6.

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After a whopping FIVE MONTHS, I finally read a book cover-to-cover!  Don't worry, there was plenty of school-related reading taking place during that time as I prepared for a huuuuuuuuuge board exam that I took yesterday!  Yay!  But my poor brain was desperately yearning for non-school related stimulation, and I was finally able to satisfy it's craving!  Unfortunately the local library here at home is closed on Sundays and Mondays, so I was forced to peruse through our home collection of books, the majority of which I've already read (or at least attempted to read).  I read this book once a few years ago, and I remembered the general premise behind the story.  However, now that I've had a formal, albeit short, introduction to psychology and psychiatry via my classes, I thought revisiting this piece with my new knowledge would prove to be a fun adventure.  

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Things I liked about this book:

1. The inspiration behind the title.  Towards the end of the book, the author describes a deep connection to the Dutch artist Johannes Vermeer's painting, Girl Interrupted at her Music.  I won't elaborate on this connection (you'll have to read it yourself to find out!), but the author's description of the emotion she feels when seeing this piece is very moving.  
2. The author's openness in describing her experience.  Granted this novel wouldn't have been such a success if she didn't write in detail about her time at McClean...
3. The author's exploration of mental health and psychiatry.  The author questions the validity of certain mental health practices, especially diagnoses, and it makes for an interesting read.  Mental health is a sticky topic because you can't see everything that's contributing to a person's state of being, and here I'm talking about the person's biology and genetics, and their life experiences.  Not to mention that one person's definition of sanity can be another's definition of insanity.
4. Lisa Rowe.  Her character is by far my favorite, mostly because of the complexity behind her actions.  She's the perfect example of what I wrote in the above point: from the outside, all of her actions while at McClean seem connected to her being a diagnosed sociopath.  In reality, as described by the author, much of what Lisa does has an ulterior, selfless motive.
5. That the patients staying at McClean feel the need to protect certain groups of people.  It's an interesting topic that the author describes in a satisfying amount of detail.
6. The author's ultimate diagnosis of borderline personality disorder.  She fabulously explores the definition of this diagnosis versus what the diagnosis means to her as a living, breathing person.

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Things I didn't like about this book:

1. The sporadic nature of the stories.  That the memoir is written as a string of stories provides the book with a certain "feel" that keeps the reader interested; however, I would have preferred to have the chapters presented with a little more direction.  This speaks to the organized, linear part of my nature.  I like certain things to be in order. 

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Psychiatry and psychology have always interested me, as I think it interests most of the population.  It's "fun" to be able to explore the motivation and origins behind behaviors, whether it's one's own behaviors or of those around you.  Although certain mental health practices have changed (i.e. lobotomies are virtually extinct as a treatment method for psychiatric illnesses), the concept of so commonly treating psychiatric problems with medications is still as big a topic of contention as ever, perhaps even more so with the plethora of medications out there now.  I've heard over and over again that psychiatrists have unwillingly been reduced to being an extension of pharmaceutical companies.  I'm sure I'll have a solid opinion on that once I experience a psych rotation during my third year of medical school.  Until then, I'm going to choose to stay neutral on that topic. 

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Recommend?  Yes!  Quick and short read.

#30: Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...

Carlson, Richard: Don't Sweat the Small Stuff... and It's All Small Stuff. New York: Hyperion, 1997. Print. 246 pages.

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SUMMARY: 100 points on how to reduce stress and thereby improve different aspects of one's life.  The main tenant (as is made obvious by the title) is to not "sweat the small stuff" and always keep the bigger picture in mind.  

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FAVORITE QUOTE: "The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude." - William James (Introduction, page 1).  

This quote isn't written by the author, but I really loved that the author opened his book with such an empowering quote.  Your attitude is always under your control.

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I found a copy of this book laying around my cousin's living room many years ago when I was a freshman in high school.  Again, going with aesthetics, I liked the size of the book.  It was small and almost a square, a design typically not utilized by publishers.  I decided to read a few entries, enjoyed it, and subsequently bought it as a graduation present for my sister in 2003.  I forgot about this book for the next ten years, until seeing it again on a bookshelf in my parents' home.  As I'm growing older, life is only getting busier and I will freely admit that I do let small, insignificant things (although at the time they seem very significant) get to me.  Now that it is summer and I am free of classes, I thought it would be a great time to have a refresher, to remind myself that I shouldn't sweat the small stuff.  

The setup of this post will be a little different: instead of listing things I liked about this book, I'm going to list my top five of the 100 points.

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Top 5 points I really liked in this book, in numerical order:

• Point #3: Let go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't be Superachievers
• We're all surrounded by individuals who are extraordinary at stressing out over anything and everything.  Sometimes I see these people for what they are: over-stressed and high-strung.  But other times I trick myself into thinking that those who have more stress in their lives must be more accomplished.  They obviously have more on their plate than me, were going to achieve more than me, and thus become more successful.  Luckily, those moments are rare.  I've learned that there is a difference between negative and positive stress, and I conscientiously avoid those who exude nothing but negative stress.  It is definitely possible to be relaxed and calm and still achieve high goals.
• Point #19: Lower Your Tolerance to Stress
• This is a great point that I always forget.  Just because I am able to carry a certain level of stress doesn't mean it is healthy.  Rather, I should always strive to lower my stress level by utilizing various methods to make a stressful situation less stressful, such as changing my attitude towards the situation, changing my approach to completing the task, etc..
• Point #54: Understand the Statement, "Wherever You Go, There You Are"
• "The significance of this statement is that it can teach you to stop constantly wishing you were somewhere else." - page 133.  A great point to remember.  Always be in the present moment.
• Point #56: Be Grateful when You're Feeling Good and Graceful when You're Feeling Bad
• This is one of the major points of my favorite self-help/mental health book, "The Happiness Trap" (see blog post: http://artemisiaeupraxia.blogspot.com/2012/05/5-happiness-trap.html).  We will have high highs and equally low lows, but neither are permanent states.  Be grateful when you're happy and life feels perfect.  Similarly, when life feels like its going to hell, remember that it will pass.
• Point #65: Be Flexible with Changes in Your Plans
• Unflexibility causes so much unnecessary stress.  Unless you're in an isolated bubble where you rely on yourself for everything, and that includes controlling traffic and the weather, then there will always be changes to your plans.  So deal with it by accepting that unexpected changes can and will happen.

Main theme I didn't like about this book:

• The author insists, in many points, that it is often better to keep one's mouth shut and let another person feel that they are right than to argue one's point.  He amends this statement one time by saying that if the argument is over a moral or ethical matter then one should definitely put forth their side.  In all other situations, according to the author, it is better to feel peace than to argue a difference of opinion.  I disagree with this statement.  Life is made much richer by learning about other points of view (which is, ironically, another theme the author expresses in numerous points).  If you know you will benefit from hearing a different side, then shouldn't you extend that same learning opportunity to other people?  Whether or not they accept such an opportunity is up to them.  But if your life is benefited by learning about other points of view, then others should be given the chance to learn from your point of view.

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I enjoyed reading this book, and because I only read a few pages at a time (I was reading two other books simultaneously), I think I benefited even more from what it had to offer.  I tried applying the points I had read on the same day as reading them, which was great practice.  Many of these points are ones that I already know (and ones I'm sure you already know), but every once in a while we need reminders, and this book is just that, a perfect  reminder.

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Recommend?  Yes!  It's a quick read and if even one lesson improves your life and reduces stress, then I think it's worth the time.

#5a. The Happiness Trap (Revisited)

Since first reading this book 4 months ago, I've implemented many of the ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) principles and have found that I am an even happier, healthier, and productive individual.  I have a better grasp of how I should react to whatever emotion decides to cross my path on any given day, it has become habit to make every action meaningful and mindful, and I've become even more content with life.  I spent the last two days skimming through the main points of this book, and because I still think it's a fantastic resource, I've decided to advertise it a second time :]

I've been feeling somewhat burned out recently, and with this, my brain also decided to amplify other issues which weren't a big deal up until yesterday, mainly how much I miss home, my family and friends, and, most of all, my old life in Los Angeles.  I decided I needed a quick "Happiness Trap" refresher, and it's done the trick!  True, the feelings of longing for home and the familiar haven't disappeared, but I've accepted their presence and, as soon as I've posted this, will redirect my thoughts and energy to chiseling away at my ever growing mountain of school work, instead of brooding, which is what I've been doing for the past two days.

SO, if you haven't read this book, I still recommend you put in the time to do so!!!  Who couldn't use a few extra pointers on how to better lead a mindful and meaningful life?  

Here's the link to the review I wrote in May:

http://artemisiaeupraxia.blogspot.com/2012/05/5-happiness-trap.html

Happy reading!

#5: The Happiness Trap

Harris, Russ: The Happiness Trap. Boston: Shambhala Publications, 2008. Print. 246 pages.
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SUMMARY: A guide to leading a mindful and meaningful life based on the techniques of ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), a psychotherapy that focuses on leading a values-based life and being present in your day-to-day activities.
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FAVORITE QUOTE: "No matter how bad the situation you're in, no matter how much pain you may be suffering, start by taking a few breaths.  If you're breathing, you know you're alive.  And as long as you're alive, there's hope." - Chapter 20, page 144.
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THIS BOOK IS AWESOME.  I'm generally very happy, cheerful, and optimistic; however, when faced with emotions on the opposite spectrum (anxiety, sadness, hopelessness), I give in to the emotion and allow it to completely consume me, for days, to the point where I am no longer able to function as a productive human being.  This is a significant problem because I believe the purpose of life is to be productive and contribute to society in a positive manner, to the extent possible given your abilities and resources.  If I'm unable to complete the activities that make me productive, I'm not living a purposeful life.  Sometimes, my anxiety, sadness, etc. will be so overpowering that I'll stop eating, sleeping, and even communicating with the people I love, which is an even bigger problem!  I also have the tendency to think that I will be happy when the next great goal is achieved, which means I'm constantly thinking about the future and rarely living in the present.  Example: in high school, I just knew I wouldn't be happy until I was accepted into a reputable college.  In college, I was waiting for a graduate school acceptance.  In graduate school, I knew I'd be happy once I got into medical school.  Surprisingly enough (not!), the happiness and serenity that came with my medical school acceptance quickly faded into, "I won't be happy until I've fallen in love and found a life partner who loves me with an equal fervor."  It's a never ending cycle!  Once I do find my love, I won't be happy until he and I are married.  Then, until we buy a home.  ETC. ETC. ETC.  With so many things going for me in life, how is it that I'm always unsatisfied?  In comes my brilliant sister, who knows a hell of a lot about psychotherapy (she's an LCSW, holds a PhD in social work, is faculty at a School of Social Work, and has 10+ years of experience under her belt), so don't take this book recommendation lightly.  She's my go-to person when I'm not feeling emotionally well because she's able to respond in a constructive and effective manner.  I told her my woes, even shed a few tears (which is exceedingly rare because I don't cry), and she ordered this book for me.  This book has been life changing, even in this short span of time, and I can sincerely say I've never felt so liberated!
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Points of this book that I appreciate:

1. Being human and having the human experience includes feeling the full spectrum of human emotions.  You need to accept that you will feel all these emotions, even the uncomfortable ones, and learn how to work with your emotions in a productive and constructive manner.  So... it's ok to feel [insert "negative" emotion here]!  It's not a deficiency on your part!  It's even healthy!  And the author goes on to detail how you should react to "negative" emotions, which is incredibly helpful to someone like me who admittedly becomes taken-in by such emotions.
2. There is no such thing as a "good" or "bad" emotion.  Some emotions make us feel better than others, but, again, to be human you need to experience all emotions.  
3. You'll never be satisfied if you're only ever running after happiness.  Happiness 100% of the time is not natural because emotions are fleeting, happiness included.  If you're always striving to feel happy, then you'll also miss out on many opportunities because some experiences come with a level of discomfort and unhappiness.
4. Your thoughts and memories are just words and pictures.  Words and pictures do not define a person; actions do.  You have to learn to not get caught up in your thoughts and memories because that is what takes us away from the present moment and into the past or future.  By taking action, guided by your values, you'll not only feel satisfied because you are being productive, you'll also be more successful in living in the present.
5. Rather than a goal-focused life, you should lead a values-focused life.  Yes, having goals is important, but by leading a values-focused life, you'll enjoy the journey to the goal, rather than just feeling satisfied once the goal has been reached and unsatisfied while attempting to reach the goal.

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I could go on and on about this book.  I really loved it, have started implementing it in my life, and have already recommended it to a few of my friends.  Although this book has many great points, it does has a central theme: LIVE AND ACT ACCORDING TO YOUR VALUES.  This will lead to a fulfilled life because your values are what define you as a person and are the points that matter to you.  By acting according to your values, you are always doing something that is personally meaningful and important.  And that is what life should be about: feeling fulfilled based on what you do, rather than just feeling happy.  Happiness does not last; it is an emotion, and emotions are not permanent.  But you can always feel fulfilled if you are doing actions in line with your values, no matter what emotion you are experiencing at that time.  You cannot control your emotions, but you can control how you deal with emotions and you can definitely control your actions.  

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Recommend?  YES.  If you're like me and don't feel satisfied with life when logically there seems to be no reason to be dissatisfied, then give this book a go!  It's simple, and yet it has a great number of points that seem to have been overlooked in this age of self-help books and seminars.  I'm truly thankful to my sister for introducing me to this new way of thinking, and I plan on re-reading this book, in case I missed a few good points.